{"id":23,"date":"2014-04-07T12:25:51","date_gmt":"2014-04-07T16:25:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/?p=23"},"modified":"2014-08-05T22:23:20","modified_gmt":"2014-08-06T02:23:20","slug":"game-thrones-two-swords-waiting-steel-chicken","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/2014\/04\/07\/game-thrones-two-swords-waiting-steel-chicken\/","title":{"rendered":"Game of Thrones &#8211; \u2018Two Swords\u2019: Waiting, Steel, and Chicken"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>Brought to you by our friends at <a href=\"http:\/\/talkthrones.com\/2014\/04\/waiting-steel-and-chicken-the-forged-patience-of-two-swords\/\" target=\"_blank\">Talk Thrones<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>[dropcap]F[\/dropcap]or one of the most anticipated hours of television in over a year, \u201cTwo Swords\u201d, the Game of Thrones Season 4 premiere, sure involves a lot of waiting.<\/p>\n<p>The Hand of the King stews as one of the few living smiths capable of forging Valyrian steel turns one sword into two. The Master of Coin mills in anticipation of a prince of Dorne. An angry, vengeful prince awaits and welcomes any excuse to take the life of a Lannister (or at least the time it takes for a quick trip to the infirmary for excessive projectile wrist-bleeding). The Mother of Dragons finds two of her lieutenants actually playing the waiting game, while she herself can\u2019t wait to get to Meereen. The Master of Coin\u2019s fiance, to everyone around her\u2019s dismay, can do nothing but wait to die, while his mistress, her handmaiden, is waiting for some affection, or at least the tenderness he offered to his wife-to-be. The most beautiful woman in the world and Queen Regent has been waiting for her brother-lover for too long, and now that he\u2019s back he\u2019s waiting on her consolation. And viewers of the show are waiting for this cruel joke of a Daario Naharis replacement to end. Soon. (More on this later.)<\/p>\n<p>Yes, in a series predicated on sharp turns and unexpected death, all these characters and plot lines waited.<\/p>\n<p>And it was glorious.<\/p>\n<p>At the outset of its season premiere, Game of Thrones hasn\u2019t progressed from the Season 3 finale chronologically for but a few weeks (as Jaime so handily points out in his wordy tussle with his sister), and geographically for however far an army of former slaves and a large man and young girl on a horse can travel in a few weeks\u2019 time, respectively. Yet, somehow, so many characters that seemed to have been working their way uphill near the end of Season 3 have now peaked, and are facing downhill with momentum, ready to rip like dragon talons into a new season of betrayal, battle, and full-frontal nudity.<\/p>\n<p>Arya has graduated from that goth freshman you knew in high school with a fetish for ancient weaponry to a full-fledged killer. Jon Snow has returned from his time beyond the wall and with the wildlings a hardened man, in more ways than one. Jaime, on the other hand, has returned home softer than when he left, in his own heart and in those of viewers. Brienne has found a landing spot her herself in King\u2019s Landing, and has at least one rather powerful fan.<\/p>\n<p>For those expecting major plot hammers to fall and fall hard for the season premiere, well, as Tyrion notes in the most repeatable line of the season\u2019s trailer (as my friends are unfortunately finding out the hard way)&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>[x_video_embed]<iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/v7m5VcpMCtU\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe>[\/x_video_embed]<\/p>\n<p>[content_band style=&#8221;color: #fff;&#8221; bg_image=&#8221;https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/7\/2014\/06\/house-lannister.jpg&#8221; parallax=&#8221;true&#8221; border=&#8221;all&#8221; inner_container=&#8221;true&#8221;] [custom_headline style=&#8221;margin-top: 0; color: #fff;&#8221; level=&#8221;h4&#8243; looks_like=&#8221;h3&#8243;]HOUSE LANNISTER[\/custom_headline][\/content_band]<\/p>\n<p>Perhaps, then, the biggest surprise of the episode wasn\u2019t in the machinations of the characters, but in the minds of the show\u2019s producers: a cold open. And, thanks to the unfazed, intent gaze of Tywin Lannister, it is a particularly frosty one. As he\u2019d tell Jaime, Tywin summoned one of three smiths capable of forging Vlyrian steel (the best of the three, of course) to transform Ned Stark\u2019s greatsword Ice into two more appropriately sized pieces, one for Jaime, and a smaller one, for either a young king or a dwarf \u2026 who are we kidding? Joffrey\u2019s getting that steel. Still stained in blood, this is the same Ice that severed the first head of the series in Episode 1, that of the deserter, and would also be the blade that ends Ned\u2019s life. It\u2019s his blood being burned into new swords for Tywin\u2019s sons.<\/p>\n<p>Jaime, to no one\u2019s surprise, rejects Tywin\u2019s order to preside over Casterly Rock in his father\u2019s stead. Not without his loving sister. Impressively, he reinstalls himself into the King\u2019s Guard with little pushback from Tywin or his immensely powerful desk. But he\u2019s not as successful at winning back the affections of his sister. Cersei tells Jaime he\u2019s been away \u201ctoo long,\u201d which makes one wonder if those trysts with her cousin were more meaningful than they appeared to be, or if her irrationality is borne of the constrictions her father is placing her under, trapping her into a paranoid, bitter box. Or both.<\/p>\n<p>After a few weeks back in King\u2019s Landing, Jaime is starting to realize that not only does his family offer him little sympathy for his capture and subsequent misfortune, but, if anything, they resent him for it. \u201cBusy getting captured,\u201d Joffrey scoffs at his father, unbeknownst to the king, before reviling Jaime for his lack of noted good deeds in the apparently famous Book of Brothers. This after a season spent learning what sort of sacrifices the Kingslayer underwent to preserve the lives of thousands, including his family.<\/p>\n<p>Tyrion and Bronn stand about in a forest to receive the first son of the Martells of Dorne. \u201cYellow balls?\u201d the former sellsword says quizzically while he attempts to make out the arriving sigils. Tyrion informs Bronn of the bad blood between the Lannisters and Martells, which, deservedly so, warrants no reaction from the dwarf\u2019s champion other than to suggest that Tyrion was sent for a reason: \u201cIn case the Martells of Dorne are looking to spill some Lannister blood \u2026 may as well be yours.<\/p>\n<p>To which Tyrion rationalizes, \u201cI happen to be an accomplished diplomat.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>When the party the Master of Coin is to greet arrives, even Tyrion\u2019s opening statements hint that Tywin is behind the controls and happy to inform other houses of that fact. \u201cWell met, my lords. His grace King Joffrey welcomes you in his name\u2026. My lord father, the King\u2019s Hand, sends his greetings as well.\u201d When he\u2019s informed that Prince Doran does not feel well enough to attend the royal wedding, Tyrion seems well aware of the danger this could spell. He also does well to track down Prince Oberyn, Doran\u2019s brother and replacement, soon after to give him his formal greeting. After a few seconds of screen time for the prince, I don\u2019t think it\u2019s a stretch to suggest that his being found at an upscale whorehouse is anything but surprising.<\/p>\n<p>[content_band style=&#8221;color: #fff;&#8221; bg_image=&#8221;https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/7\/2014\/06\/house-targaryen.jpg&#8221; parallax=&#8221;true&#8221; border=&#8221;all&#8221; inner_container=&#8221;true&#8221;] [custom_headline style=&#8221;margin-top: 0; color: #fff;&#8221; level=&#8221;h4&#8243; looks_like=&#8221;h3&#8243;]HOUSE TARGARYEN[\/custom_headline][\/content_band]<\/p>\n<p>Daenerys sits on a rocky perch above a cool blue beach, the head of her largest dragon resting in her lap, eyes closed and welcoming its mother\u2019s touch. Her two other children approach in the distance, looking like seagulls from afar before arriving, dwarfing any man and crashing its dinner, a Jurassic Park-style bloody goat, to the ground in front of Dany before all three dragons feed. A stray touch to the largest yields a snap of the neck and a hiss at the dragon\u2019s mother, and she and we are reminded, before Jorah comes along to state the obvious to Dany (as has become his role) that \u201cDragons cannot be tamed, Khaleesi.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Remember Daario Naharis? The dangerous, exotic, pragmatic sellsword that had Dany swooning at the sight of his former partners\u2019 decapitated heads? He risked his life to provide the Khaleesi with the Second Sons army, and his progressive stance on lovemaking and slaves had thoroughly weakened her knees. But all that is gone now. Not the character\u2014just the danger, the mystery, and the sexuality that formerly resided in the character. Actor Michiel Huisman has taken over for last season\u2019s Ed Skrein, a regrettable replacement. Now, the lieutenant of the Second Sons is nothing more than a mild-mannered Shia LaBeouf impersonator, unable to intimidate any slave girl on the road to Meereen, and concerned more with flower arrangements than arriving at roll call on time.<\/p>\n<p>[content_band style=&#8221;color: #fff;&#8221; bg_image=&#8221;https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/7\/2014\/06\/ned-stark.jpg&#8221; parallax=&#8221;true&#8221; border=&#8221;all&#8221; inner_container=&#8221;true&#8221;] [custom_headline style=&#8221;margin-top: 0; color: #fff;&#8221; level=&#8221;h4&#8243; looks_like=&#8221;h3&#8243;]HOUSE STARK[\/custom_headline][\/content_band]<\/p>\n<p>Sansa paces through King\u2019s Landing in a depressed daze if she moves at all. She refuses to eat, against the pleading of Tyrion and Shae. Tyrion, in typical fashion disregarding his physical stature, acts as a man much larger than he, making every attempt to console his future wife, knowing neither of them could ever love one another. His appeal to her is genuine, speaking well of her fallen kin. But she can\u2019t hear any of it, tossing back what would later be realized as a paltry attempt by excusing herself to the prayer ground.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOf course, of course. Prayer can be helpful \u2026 I hear,\u201d he offers.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t pray anymore \u2026 It\u2019s the only place I can go where people don\u2019t talk to me.\u201d So neither of them pray, at least they have something in common.<\/p>\n<p>[pullquote cite=&#8221;Sansa Stark&#8221; type=&#8221;left&#8221;]I don\u2019t pray anymore \u2026 It\u2019s the only place I can go where people don\u2019t talk to me[\/pullquote]<\/p>\n<p>After months of me asking my friends \u201cWhat in the seven hells are you doin\u2019 with the Stark bitch?!\u201d viewers are treated to the best budding relationship on the show, the Arya and the Hound Best Friends Murder Tour, for the final 10 minutes of the episode. While complaining that she needs her own horse to escape the Hound\u2019s stench, the two come upon five King\u2019s Guard. Arya presses the Hound and herself into a tavern so that she may get Needle, her trusty toothpick of a sword, back from the officer who killed her friend in front of her. A hearty conversation between Joffrey\u2019s former body guard and Arya\u2019s victim-to-be starts off friendly enough, but the threats continue to pile up, the most delightful being the Hound\u2019s insistence that if the officers don\u2019t cooperate, he\u2019ll eat every damn chicken in the bar. This only minutes after the Hound told Arya that, not dissimilarly to The Wire\u2019s Omar, \u201cA man\u2019s gotta have a code.\u201d And his is that he\u2019s not a thief. A killer, sure. But not a thief. Shockingly, it doesn\u2019t end well for the five King\u2019s Guard. It takes a bit longer for Arya to join the fray than I thought it would, but when she does she hardly disappoints, bashing one man over the head, then rendering her target immobile with a sword to the back of the legs, before recreating her friend\u2019s murder, word for word, puncture for puncture.<\/p>\n<p>Arya and the Hound exit the tavern in good health and better spirits. She gets her horse. And he gets his chicken.<\/p>\n<p><strong>OTHER NOTES<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Although no one else in the family garnered enough screen time for an entire HOUSE MARTELL heading, Prince Oberyn is at the forefront of badassery. Open, both with his sexuality and with his bloodthirsty intentions, he\u2019s a refreshing turn from the norm of King\u2019s Landing (refreshing for us, life-threatening for him). It seems he doesn\u2019t have many friends in King\u2019s Landing, but that likely won\u2019t last long.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Margaery Tyrell is warned by Lady Olenna not to joke about Joffrey\u2019s grim tastes, even if just in front of her grandmother. A lot about Lady Olenna is a mystery, she doesn\u2019t offer much into the hand she holds. Which only means the advice she actually offers up should not be ignored.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Not seen: Bran, Theon\/Reek, Ramsay, House Bolton, Stannis, Sir Davos, Varys, Littlefinger, Whitewalkers, and a whole mess of others.<\/p>\n<p>[author title=&#8221;About the Author&#8221;]<\/p>\n<p>[custom_headline type=&#8221;center&#8221; level=&#8221;h2&#8243; looks_like=&#8221;h3&#8243; accent=&#8221;true&#8221;]Recent Posts[\/custom_headline]<\/p>\n<p>[recent_posts count=&#8221;1&#8243; orientation=&#8221;horizontal&#8221;] [recent_posts count=&#8221;3&#8243; orientation=&#8221;horizontal&#8221; offset=&#8221;1&#8243;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Brought to you by our friends at Talk Thrones. [dropcap]F[\/dropcap]or one of the most anticipated hours of television in over a year, \u201cTwo Swords\u201d, the Game of Thrones Season 4 premiere, sure involves a lot of waiting. The Hand of the King stews as one of the few living smiths capable of forging Valyrian steel<\/p>\n<div class=\"read-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/2014\/04\/07\/game-thrones-two-swords-waiting-steel-chicken\/\" title=\"Read More\">Read More<\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":25,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,2],"tags":[7,8],"class_list":{"0":"post-23","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-game-of-thrones","8":"category-television","9":"tag-game-of-thrones-2","10":"tag-two-swords"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/25"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hardwoodandhollywood.com\/pop-culture-spin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}